Spinning out of control

Do you ever have one of those days when everything seems to be spinning out of control? I know I should be running to Jesus, but instead I zone out with watching 4 hours of television. Pretty wretched. guess it's odd for me to feel feelings. Like being alone. Not filler time, but just me. Alone. I kind of like it. I guess in a way, it's not an unusual experience. We're all alone, even if we have significant others & friends. There's quiet, still space, where it's just you. And God. If you let Him in. Sometimes even I forget to let Him in, to give Him complete control. And just be still with Him. No worship music, no books. Just me and Him. Best friends. The one who never lets us down. He's always there for us. In a way that NO other human can! :) I need you Jesus. Fol this gaping bleeding gash in my heart. Heal me, Lord, of heartache & quiet desperation.