Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Falling For God...are you willful or willing to fall for Him?
Falling for God "Willingness means learning to embrace a state of continuous surrender to the will of God. Willfulness, by contrast, sets us apart from God, by attempting to master, direct, control, or otherwise manipulate our existence. It leads away from relationship into the hell of isolation-from the loving community of being, meaning and love-and from the community with the Father, Son & the Holy Spirit.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Date with Jesus
"Grace is God...with salvation comes an invitation to join in with the Trinity as part of their eternal community of love. And with it, the offer to enjoy intimate fellowship that surpasses what is possible in the best of marriages." -Falling for God (Saying yes to His extravagant Proposal)
Aaaaaah yes. Dinner with Jesus. I've been neglecting my lover. Is that okay to write? Yes, he is the lover and protector of my soul, but it feels so scandalous to say it. I've been neglecting you Jesus. I talk about you non-stop, like my friend who left the country to travel around the world. But no. You're right here with me, and you've never left. You never left. But I neglected you. never spend time with you. Even on the Sabbath, our Date Nights! Hm. Guess you were right all this time. I was never ready for a husband. I can't even make time for the one I have!
But I've done some marriage counseling and I'm ready to renew my vows for you. The rate of divorce in second marriages is 60%, and I'd NEVER want to go out with Allah, Buddha, or Vishnu. You're worth it. You're worth everything to me. Yes, I want to declare my love for you, hopeless, reckless, carefree love. I want to fall in love with you all over again. Maybe I won't feel like a teenager, but it'll probably mature into another kind of love. Deeper, stronger, more powerful than anything I've ever known. I'm ready to dive in again.
Aaaaaah yes. Dinner with Jesus. I've been neglecting my lover. Is that okay to write? Yes, he is the lover and protector of my soul, but it feels so scandalous to say it. I've been neglecting you Jesus. I talk about you non-stop, like my friend who left the country to travel around the world. But no. You're right here with me, and you've never left. You never left. But I neglected you. never spend time with you. Even on the Sabbath, our Date Nights! Hm. Guess you were right all this time. I was never ready for a husband. I can't even make time for the one I have!
But I've done some marriage counseling and I'm ready to renew my vows for you. The rate of divorce in second marriages is 60%, and I'd NEVER want to go out with Allah, Buddha, or Vishnu. You're worth it. You're worth everything to me. Yes, I want to declare my love for you, hopeless, reckless, carefree love. I want to fall in love with you all over again. Maybe I won't feel like a teenager, but it'll probably mature into another kind of love. Deeper, stronger, more powerful than anything I've ever known. I'm ready to dive in again.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Spinning out of control
Do you ever have one of those days when everything seems to be spinning out of control? I know I should be running to Jesus, but instead I zone out with watching 4 hours of television. Pretty wretched. guess it's odd for me to feel feelings. Like being alone. Not filler time, but just me. Alone. I kind of like it. I guess in a way, it's not an unusual experience. We're all alone, even if we have significant others & friends. There's quiet, still space, where it's just you. And God. If you let Him in. Sometimes even I forget to let Him in, to give Him complete control. And just be still with Him. No worship music, no books. Just me and Him. Best friends. The one who never lets us down. He's always there for us. In a way that NO other human can! :) I need you Jesus. Fol this gaping bleeding gash in my heart. Heal me, Lord, of heartache & quiet desperation.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Fasting and prayer
"I really am curious about how your fast went. I would love to hear of all the spiritual breakthroughs you experienced as a result of your fast.
A word of caution when taking advice of non-followers or people who have not attempted to do what you're trying to do. Ask followers first about whether this is possible.
I say this because I too felt by God to do a 7 day water fast. I don't think I had ever done a water fast before. When I used to be a Buddhist, I think I fasted every full moon for a couple of years. Then I was born again, I was introduced to fasting, but for a different spiritual realm. I've probably done 4 or 5 three day juice fasts, a couple 7 day juice fasts, and one 10 day fast on the Master cleanse. Anyway, one of my believing friends inadvertently discouraged me by saying he wasn't sure it was possible. I pointed out when King David fasted for his son with Bathsheeba to live, and he fasted for 7 days, but it didn't specify what kind of fast. I think however, with the exception of Daniel and his Hebrew brothers' fast, it was probably always a water fast back in the ancient days. Again, I am not sure, so don't take my word for it. (Plus they probably didn't have the access to newfangled juicers like we have today! ha ha.)
Okay, to get to my point, I felt called to go to Justice House of Prayer's Call conference in Boston for 3 nights in a row. And to speak directly to my fears, Pastor Lou Engle said, "I fasted for 40 days on water!" And as soon as I heard that, I knew it was God's call on my life for the next 7 days to drink only water. Actually, I was thinking to only water fast for 5 days total, bc I had already drank 100% grape juice and 100% apple juice on the first two days out of fear and not trusting in the Lord. So, I started on Thursday night, and I was planning on breaking my fast Thursday night, but after hearing that it was possible for FORTY days, I thought, I can do five more! Upon further internet research, one person recommended only fruits and juices 2 or 3 days leading UP to the fast. WOW! That made total sense to me! And that confirmed that I was going to try to take the plunge and take on 2 more days of water fasting and finish what I started! YEAH!
So now I feel strengthened. To finish what God asked me to do, 7 days of water fasting. 2 days of juice fasting before and after, which will give me an 11 day fast, the longest I've ever done. When I first started, God told me, "This is going to be the most powerful fast you have EVER done." Whew. How is that for confirmation. I thought that it was strange that a 7 day fast would be my most powerful. I have heard of TREMENDOUS breakthroughs when people fast for 40 days!!!! I've heard of cancer being healed, gray hair growing in completely black, miraculous stories of salvation. So, I completely believe. One of these days, I am praying for God to lead me into a 40 days. I want to experience what Jesus experienced.
On a side note, I wasn't PURPOSELY trying to lose weight, but I had thought I had gotten a little out of shape since I stopped running and swimming so much. I was 3 lbs over my desired boundary a couple of weeks ago, but by the time I started I was at my ideal weight. When I got on the scale this morning, I was STUNNED to see that I was NINE pounds lighter! Again, I want to specify that I wasn't trying to lose weight, but it certainly was nice to see that I was one pound lower than my high school weight! Of course in high school I was running track every day was solid beautiful muscle. I really want to recommend this to people who seem to have food addictions, but it's a very delicate subject.
Wow. You got me rambling! But I pray that your walk with Jesus is still strong. If you get this message in time, please pray for me. Healing of eczema, a weak back and neck, fits of temper/impatience, healing in my family (immediate and extended), ringing in my ears, athlete's foot and on a spiritual level-that I would hear God more clearly, obey him more readily, spend more time reading the Bible and that he would BLESS and anoint my ministry!!!!!!!!!!"
And that is the end of my letter. I want to encourage ALL of you to get out there and fast. There is TREMENDOUS personal, spiritual, physical, emotional, mental and intellectual breakthrough when you complete a fast, for any length of time. Obviously, 40 days is the optimal amount of time, but any length is a start. I believe as believers we are called to fast and pray REGULARLY to break off demonic influence over the lives of us and others. For example in:
The Healing of a Boy With a Demon (Matthew 17)
14) When they came to the crowd, a man approached Jesus and knelt before him.
15) “Lord, have mercy on my son,” he said. “He has seizures and is suffering greatly. He often falls into the fire or into the water.
16) I brought him to your disciples, but they could not heal him.”
17) “O unbelieving and perverse generation,” Jesus replied, “how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy here to me.” 18) Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed from that moment.
19) Then the disciples came to Jesus in private and asked, “Why couldn’t we drive it out?”
20) He replied, “Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”
Believe! We have the power to fast, and to heal, to rebuke devils and cast them out!!! It's not only the biblical times but NOW we are called forth to do God's will!
May God be with you.
p.s. One more thing, I had a divine appointment tonight. I was on the train coming home when I noticed the woman next to me getting really stressed out and bothered by all the noise the other passengers were making. She seemed upset so I tried to empathize with her. She started hitting her arm, so I thought, maybe I should pray for her pain. But she looked like she was getting off at the next stop, so I told God, if she gets off now, I won't pray, but if she stays on, I will pray with her. So, she got up and I said, God bless you. She said God bless you too, almost surprised. So I kept reading my bible, which I NEVER bring on the train to read, and she jumps BACK on the train to ask me where she can find a Catholic church. So she rides with me all the way to my stop and I ask her if I can pray again with her. She says no, that in her French Catholic church, it is very strict and there are a lot of rules and you can only pray at a CERTAIN HOUR! IT was so surreal and different from what I'm used to. So we talked about all the usual Catholic/Protestant differences, like how they believe the Virgin Mary is the queen of heaven. Oh boy. You can imagine. But we exchanged information and I told her I would pray pray pray for her. I also said I would try to find the best church for her. She is looking for some kind of work (bartending, etc), and I told her I would try my best to find her something. But she definitely wants to find a church that is more similar to the one she attended in France (she is part Indian (bindi)) too! Anyway, I thought it was SO cool that God would put someone into my life that way. I am praying for her to be born again and renounce any false ideology she might have. I tried to emphasize in a really loving way that Jesus died to be our way to Father God, and that Mary didn't die for us to be the intercessor to Jesus or God the Father. Hopefully something I said planted a seed and through our friendship her life will be completely changed! Please keep us in your prayers!!!!
A word of caution when taking advice of non-followers or people who have not attempted to do what you're trying to do. Ask followers first about whether this is possible.
I say this because I too felt by God to do a 7 day water fast. I don't think I had ever done a water fast before. When I used to be a Buddhist, I think I fasted every full moon for a couple of years. Then I was born again, I was introduced to fasting, but for a different spiritual realm. I've probably done 4 or 5 three day juice fasts, a couple 7 day juice fasts, and one 10 day fast on the Master cleanse. Anyway, one of my believing friends inadvertently discouraged me by saying he wasn't sure it was possible. I pointed out when King David fasted for his son with Bathsheeba to live, and he fasted for 7 days, but it didn't specify what kind of fast. I think however, with the exception of Daniel and his Hebrew brothers' fast, it was probably always a water fast back in the ancient days. Again, I am not sure, so don't take my word for it. (Plus they probably didn't have the access to newfangled juicers like we have today! ha ha.)
Okay, to get to my point, I felt called to go to Justice House of Prayer's Call conference in Boston for 3 nights in a row. And to speak directly to my fears, Pastor Lou Engle said, "I fasted for 40 days on water!" And as soon as I heard that, I knew it was God's call on my life for the next 7 days to drink only water. Actually, I was thinking to only water fast for 5 days total, bc I had already drank 100% grape juice and 100% apple juice on the first two days out of fear and not trusting in the Lord. So, I started on Thursday night, and I was planning on breaking my fast Thursday night, but after hearing that it was possible for FORTY days, I thought, I can do five more! Upon further internet research, one person recommended only fruits and juices 2 or 3 days leading UP to the fast. WOW! That made total sense to me! And that confirmed that I was going to try to take the plunge and take on 2 more days of water fasting and finish what I started! YEAH!
So now I feel strengthened. To finish what God asked me to do, 7 days of water fasting. 2 days of juice fasting before and after, which will give me an 11 day fast, the longest I've ever done. When I first started, God told me, "This is going to be the most powerful fast you have EVER done." Whew. How is that for confirmation. I thought that it was strange that a 7 day fast would be my most powerful. I have heard of TREMENDOUS breakthroughs when people fast for 40 days!!!! I've heard of cancer being healed, gray hair growing in completely black, miraculous stories of salvation. So, I completely believe. One of these days, I am praying for God to lead me into a 40 days. I want to experience what Jesus experienced.
On a side note, I wasn't PURPOSELY trying to lose weight, but I had thought I had gotten a little out of shape since I stopped running and swimming so much. I was 3 lbs over my desired boundary a couple of weeks ago, but by the time I started I was at my ideal weight. When I got on the scale this morning, I was STUNNED to see that I was NINE pounds lighter! Again, I want to specify that I wasn't trying to lose weight, but it certainly was nice to see that I was one pound lower than my high school weight! Of course in high school I was running track every day was solid beautiful muscle. I really want to recommend this to people who seem to have food addictions, but it's a very delicate subject.
Wow. You got me rambling! But I pray that your walk with Jesus is still strong. If you get this message in time, please pray for me. Healing of eczema, a weak back and neck, fits of temper/impatience, healing in my family (immediate and extended), ringing in my ears, athlete's foot and on a spiritual level-that I would hear God more clearly, obey him more readily, spend more time reading the Bible and that he would BLESS and anoint my ministry!!!!!!!!!!"
And that is the end of my letter. I want to encourage ALL of you to get out there and fast. There is TREMENDOUS personal, spiritual, physical, emotional, mental and intellectual breakthrough when you complete a fast, for any length of time. Obviously, 40 days is the optimal amount of time, but any length is a start. I believe as believers we are called to fast and pray REGULARLY to break off demonic influence over the lives of us and others. For example in:
The Healing of a Boy With a Demon (Matthew 17)
14) When they came to the crowd, a man approached Jesus and knelt before him.
15) “Lord, have mercy on my son,” he said. “He has seizures and is suffering greatly. He often falls into the fire or into the water.
16) I brought him to your disciples, but they could not heal him.”
17) “O unbelieving and perverse generation,” Jesus replied, “how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy here to me.” 18) Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed from that moment.
19) Then the disciples came to Jesus in private and asked, “Why couldn’t we drive it out?”
20) He replied, “Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”
Believe! We have the power to fast, and to heal, to rebuke devils and cast them out!!! It's not only the biblical times but NOW we are called forth to do God's will!
May God be with you.
p.s. One more thing, I had a divine appointment tonight. I was on the train coming home when I noticed the woman next to me getting really stressed out and bothered by all the noise the other passengers were making. She seemed upset so I tried to empathize with her. She started hitting her arm, so I thought, maybe I should pray for her pain. But she looked like she was getting off at the next stop, so I told God, if she gets off now, I won't pray, but if she stays on, I will pray with her. So, she got up and I said, God bless you. She said God bless you too, almost surprised. So I kept reading my bible, which I NEVER bring on the train to read, and she jumps BACK on the train to ask me where she can find a Catholic church. So she rides with me all the way to my stop and I ask her if I can pray again with her. She says no, that in her French Catholic church, it is very strict and there are a lot of rules and you can only pray at a CERTAIN HOUR! IT was so surreal and different from what I'm used to. So we talked about all the usual Catholic/Protestant differences, like how they believe the Virgin Mary is the queen of heaven. Oh boy. You can imagine. But we exchanged information and I told her I would pray pray pray for her. I also said I would try to find the best church for her. She is looking for some kind of work (bartending, etc), and I told her I would try my best to find her something. But she definitely wants to find a church that is more similar to the one she attended in France (she is part Indian (bindi)) too! Anyway, I thought it was SO cool that God would put someone into my life that way. I am praying for her to be born again and renounce any false ideology she might have. I tried to emphasize in a really loving way that Jesus died to be our way to Father God, and that Mary didn't die for us to be the intercessor to Jesus or God the Father. Hopefully something I said planted a seed and through our friendship her life will be completely changed! Please keep us in your prayers!!!!
Saturday, September 24, 2011
What is strength?
"Strength is not the absence of vulnerability. Strength is knowing what your weaknesses are and working with them." - How can I get through to you (closing the intamacy gap between men and women) by Terrence Real.
this book is absolutely amazing in helping me to understand the psychology of men and patriarchal psychology.
this book is absolutely amazing in helping me to understand the psychology of men and patriarchal psychology.
Friday, September 23, 2011
Christians are Cheer Leaders!
Lights have a very cheering influence, and so have Christians. A Christian ought to be a comforter, with kind words on his lips, and sympathy in his heart; he should carry sunshine wherever he goes, and diffuse happiness around him.
Gracious Spirit dwell with me;
I myself would gracious be,
And with words that help and heal
Would thy life in mine reveal,
And with actions bold and meek
Would for Christ my Saviour speak.
From R.C. Spurgeon
When I meet negative for nasty Christians, I find that I'm usally speechless. There are times when I wanna say, "Excuse me, I believe I'll be revoking your Christian card." You meet some Christians and you actually want to discourage them from preaching the Gospel! Sometimes we just have to chuck all the theology and ideology and just work on being nice. Like the Mormons. Lol
Gracious Spirit dwell with me;
I myself would gracious be,
And with words that help and heal
Would thy life in mine reveal,
And with actions bold and meek
Would for Christ my Saviour speak.
From R.C. Spurgeon
When I meet negative for nasty Christians, I find that I'm usally speechless. There are times when I wanna say, "Excuse me, I believe I'll be revoking your Christian card." You meet some Christians and you actually want to discourage them from preaching the Gospel! Sometimes we just have to chuck all the theology and ideology and just work on being nice. Like the Mormons. Lol
Monday, August 29, 2011
Follow your dreams
If you don't have a dream, start praying, "God give me your dream." If you can't write down the dream God has given you, you need to be praying. If you don't have a dream, you're not living, you just existing. God placed you on this earth for a purpose. -reposted from Manni Kumar of Beersheba Church
Guess that's why I'm relieved I have a dream. I was so lost for so long without one. Guess I've wanted to be an inspirational speaker for a long time now, but it always worried me. Weirdly enough, it seems luke a pompous thing to want to do! I don't know, guess I just like inspiring others. I was a cheerleader in high school, & I've always been a kind of cheerleader in life. Why not do it for a living?
And one of my favorite quotes in the world is in the Bible: Psalm 20:4 NIV
May he give you the desire of your heart
and make all your plans succeed.
Or in NKJV, Psalm 20:1-8
1) To the Chief Musician. A Psalm of David. May the Lord answer you in the day of trouble; May the name of the God of Jacob defend you; May He send you help from the sanctuary,
And strengthen you out of Zion; May He remember all your offerings,
And accept your burnt sacrifice. Selah May He grant you according to your heart’s desire,
And fulfill all your purpose. We will rejoice in your salvation,
And in the name of our God we will set up our banners!
May the Lord fulfill all your petitions. Now I know that the Lord saves His anointed;
He will answer him from His holy heaven
With the saving strength of His right hand. Some trust in chariots, and some in horses;
But we will remember the name of the Lord our God. They have bowed down and fallen;
But we have risen and stand upright.
Guess that's why I'm relieved I have a dream. I was so lost for so long without one. Guess I've wanted to be an inspirational speaker for a long time now, but it always worried me. Weirdly enough, it seems luke a pompous thing to want to do! I don't know, guess I just like inspiring others. I was a cheerleader in high school, & I've always been a kind of cheerleader in life. Why not do it for a living?
And one of my favorite quotes in the world is in the Bible: Psalm 20:4 NIV
May he give you the desire of your heart
and make all your plans succeed.
Or in NKJV, Psalm 20:1-8
1) To the Chief Musician. A Psalm of David. May the Lord answer you in the day of trouble; May the name of the God of Jacob defend you; May He send you help from the sanctuary,
And strengthen you out of Zion; May He remember all your offerings,
And accept your burnt sacrifice. Selah May He grant you according to your heart’s desire,
And fulfill all your purpose. We will rejoice in your salvation,
And in the name of our God we will set up our banners!
May the Lord fulfill all your petitions. Now I know that the Lord saves His anointed;
He will answer him from His holy heaven
With the saving strength of His right hand. Some trust in chariots, and some in horses;
But we will remember the name of the Lord our God. They have bowed down and fallen;
But we have risen and stand upright.
Monday, August 15, 2011
Surrender to Christ
"Total, unconditional surrender to GOD is the first-and most important-step toward total, unconditional success in every area of your life." -Win Every Battle, conquering fear and claiming victory for success in life, by Michael Galiga
Sunday, August 14, 2011
The love of Christ
Colossians 3:12-17 NKJV
Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection. And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.
I've been struggling with this so much lately as people have been hurting me or particularly in my apt search, people haven't been getting back to me. It's been such a source of frustration! But we must forgive & mover on, with the binds of liver. That's been such a struggle for me.
Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection. And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.
I've been struggling with this so much lately as people have been hurting me or particularly in my apt search, people haven't been getting back to me. It's been such a source of frustration! But we must forgive & mover on, with the binds of liver. That's been such a struggle for me.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Build an excellent success team for an excellent you!
Success team = a team of people who are dedicated to see you succeed in every area of your life; spiritually, emotionally, financially, career path, family relationships, friendships, etc. Success team members can mentor & disciple each other bilaterally to bring out the absolute best in each other!
John 15:13 NKJV
Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.
Proverbs 27:17 NKJV
As iron sharpens iron,
So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.
John 15:13 NKJV
Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.
Proverbs 27:17 NKJV
As iron sharpens iron,
So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.
Friday, August 12, 2011
Empower yourself by empowering others
If your actions create a legacy that inspires others to dream more, learn more, do more, and become more, then you are an excellent leader. -Dolly Parton
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Surround yourself with excellent people!
Keys to success: make a conscious effort to surround yourself with positive, nourishing, & uplifting people-people who believe in you, encourage you to go after your dreams, & applaud your victories. Surround yourself with possibility thinkers, idealists & visionaries.
Avoid toxic people.
-The Success Principles, How to get from where you are to where you want to be by Jack Canfield
Avoid toxic people.
-The Success Principles, How to get from where you are to where you want to be by Jack Canfield
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Some books, and people, are game changers!
We have one customer, a Reverend Wells, who is the utmost in turning frowns upside down. One of my favorite expressions from him is, "You're under the spout where the glory pours out!" Or
"Refuse to condemn yourself!"
"Get yourself an attitude of gratitude!"
One of my friends, Buds, gave me this INCREDIBLE book called
Mindset. On p. 110, Dr. Carol Dweck writes, "...One (factor) that was absolutely key was the type of leader who in every case lead the company into greatness. These were not the larger than life, charismatic types who oozed ego and self-proclaimed talent. They were self-effacing people who constantly asked questions and had the ability to confront the must brutal answers-that is, to look failures in the face, even their own, while maintaining faith that they would succeed in the end."
I love the growth mindset!
"Refuse to condemn yourself!"
"Get yourself an attitude of gratitude!"
One of my friends, Buds, gave me this INCREDIBLE book called
Mindset. On p. 110, Dr. Carol Dweck writes, "...One (factor) that was absolutely key was the type of leader who in every case lead the company into greatness. These were not the larger than life, charismatic types who oozed ego and self-proclaimed talent. They were self-effacing people who constantly asked questions and had the ability to confront the must brutal answers-that is, to look failures in the face, even their own, while maintaining faith that they would succeed in the end."
I love the growth mindset!
Friday, June 10, 2011
Only one Judge
I went to jury duty yesterday, and it was so cool. The judge wanted to ask me a question, & as I stood before him, I was nervous. But he completely put me at ease, and I felt so relaxed. Then I thought about our heavenly Judge, GOD, who will judge our thoughts & deeds & life on earth. See, if we accept Jesus into our hearts, then Jesus pays 4 ALL our sins, & we get into heaven. I pray He lets me in, even though I'm a wicked sinner, because I've accepted him & I'm living for Him now and He loves me, & died 4 me. Please accept Him as YOUR savior. It's never too late. Until you're actually dead.
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Top 5 Reasons to Abstain from Sex before Marriage
1. Sexually Transmitted Diseases-best way to not worry and not catch them... Stop having sex before marriage! Condoms break. And even if they don't, they still don't protect against most STDs.
2. Trust-if you're ready to take that crazy step of faith, you might be ready to trust someone with your body...and your life.
3. Pregnancy-Raising a child in this world will take lots of energy, time and money. Are you prepared? Will your one night stand help raise your child?
4. Abortion. Not ready to have a baby? Ready to be a murderer? Koreans count the 9 months in your mother's womb as the beginning of life. Koreans are wise people. ; )
5. Head games. Not sure if he or she truly loves you? Well, if they're willing to commit to spend the rest of your life together, it's gotta mean something, right?
2. Trust-if you're ready to take that crazy step of faith, you might be ready to trust someone with your body...and your life.
3. Pregnancy-Raising a child in this world will take lots of energy, time and money. Are you prepared? Will your one night stand help raise your child?
4. Abortion. Not ready to have a baby? Ready to be a murderer? Koreans count the 9 months in your mother's womb as the beginning of life. Koreans are wise people. ; )
5. Head games. Not sure if he or she truly loves you? Well, if they're willing to commit to spend the rest of your life together, it's gotta mean something, right?
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
funding the terrorists in Pakistan
Okay, $1,000,000,000 per year to Pakistan. Sadly, we are paying or hopefully !were! funding large sums of money to people who essentially hate us. Or hate Chrisitians. And Hindustan (India). Pakistan an ally to the U.S.? That's a joke if I ever heard one. When you read 3 Cups of Tea, now I really know who's been funding the mahadrassas (sic?), the schools of jihad...probably not the Saudis...it was probably US!!! Who's friggin hare-brained idea was that? 10 years ago...that's George W. Bush!!! None of this is making ANY sense to me at all. Why would we send that kind of money that way? Do you know what $1 billion can buy in Pakistan????? I think it proves that George W. Bush is not a Christian. Because the Holy Spirit could NOT have advised this...
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Furiously Happy
Today, I am furiously happy. I'm finishing my 3 day fast in 2 hours, which I am wildly excited about. The funny thing is, I'm not even excited about eating, I am excited about the spiritual cleansing not eating has given me. I got a chance to resolve some things with people and air some feelings that were clamped down inside my heart and it was eating me up! But I love that God has given me the gift of tears. I can't imagine being one of those people who never cries and never being able to release these serious emotions. Crying is a shower for the soul.
I feel so blessed to be in a church community. So many times I meet people who say they believe in Jesus, but they don't want to go to church. WHAT?!?!?!?! Obviously Jesus never told us to go to church, but that's because he started a movement that we are called to follow. Paul the apostle was given direct insight from God on how we were supposed to act as a body of believers, but really, a body of believers will be filled with humans. And you know humans! They are filled with SIN! So we have this inherently sinful group of people, that is NOT God, but is supposed to FOLLOW GOD, but as we all know, PEOPLE MAKE MISTAKES! That's why you can't dismiss church because people will hurt your feelings or piss you off or rub you the wrong way. You're going to have these things happen to you. Without a doubt, without a question. But the beauty of a body of believers is that we are each called to love and serve the LORD, and each other. That's all. And if we both have the same set of instructions, beliefs and goals, we'll eventually have to end up in the same place. NO CHURCH IS PERFECT! Why? Because humans are imperfect, sinful, broken. But as a body of believers, we are called to humbly limp together as best we can to love and care and pray for each other as much as we know how and love each other as Jesus loves us. It's odd, but it works.
Sung Yun's Top Ten Reasons to go to Church!
10. Praise and Worship. Where else are you going to sing your heart out and dance around like crazy and not look like a nut? Ok, I look like a nut anyway, but at least it's tolerated or mildly understood!
9. You get to dress up and wear cute outfits and strut your stuff! (okay, not really, I was just checking to see if you were paying attention.)
8. You have a community of people who will pray for you as you struggle through life's inevitable struggles.
7. Communion with God. It says in King James Bible, Matthew 18:20 "For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them." It's a time to reflect on God and everything he is blessing you with.
6. You get to hear wonderful scripture. Let's face, you and I both know we all fail at keeping up with our Bible reading. At the very LEAST, it's a dose of much needed scripture. Why do you need scripture? It's the Word of God, which is the Sword of the Spirit, which is one of our most powerful weapons against the enemy. When he's attacking, you need a counter attack.
5. If you're not in a family, it's harder for you to grow. Growth takes discomfort and change! God's changing you and developing you so you can be of use to him in advancing HIS plan and HIS kingdom. Not yours. (Ok, that was a little plagiarized from my pastor's sermon today.)
4. Accountability! It's a group of people who will keep you in check. Your ego. Your sin struggles/issues. (Everyone has one, trust me.)
3. A place for you to tithe! God gives us 100% of what he have. He asks us to give him 10% back as a love offering. A thank you. And then he will actually bless you with much more! You do the math, it's a win win situation! Try it for one year. Even if you don't believe in God, send a check to any church (mine is Beacon City Church if you don't know where to find one), 10% of all your earnings, and just see if he doesn't bless you above and beyond by the end of the year! You'd be silly not to benefit from his financial blessings!
2. School of life. Life on earth is a just a training ground for HEAVEN (if you let Jesus into your heart, receive Him as your Savior who died for your sins so you can become a new creature in Christ who follows his commands and shares His love with others) or HELL, (if you refuse to accept Jesus into your heart and say that it's just a bunch of baloney and continue sinning and refuse to turn away from your sin and help and love others).
1. Where else are you gonna meet other Jesus freaks?
Ask not what your church can do for you, but what you can do for your church. Too many people come in with the attitude, what are these people doing for me? That might be a wrong attitude! Think about it. Jesus was serving his constituents, and the disciples were healing and sharing Jesus' plan of salvation. They weren't like, oh, what are these people doing for me? It's actually a pretty simple formula. You love others, and God loves you. You meet others' needs, God meets yours. Cool, huh?
If you're not attending church, I question whether you are truly committed to following Christ and loving your fellow human. Or if there is something on your heart you need to approach people about, and forgive them for. My take on Christian conflict is that at least ONE or BOTH members are in sin. We are commanded, if we have a problem, to approach that person directly. Not backstab, backbite, gossip, but to directly go to that person and talk about what's bothering you. Jesus calls for assertive people. Not passive aggressive, but straight up and directly. Paul was all about owning your feelings and taking responsibility for them, as well as your actions. I love that about being a believer in Christ. There is one truth, and that is truth is LOVE. Love of God, love of Jesus, love of Holy Spirit, love of one another. There is always a truth and clarity in love.
I feel so blessed to be in a church community. So many times I meet people who say they believe in Jesus, but they don't want to go to church. WHAT?!?!?!?! Obviously Jesus never told us to go to church, but that's because he started a movement that we are called to follow. Paul the apostle was given direct insight from God on how we were supposed to act as a body of believers, but really, a body of believers will be filled with humans. And you know humans! They are filled with SIN! So we have this inherently sinful group of people, that is NOT God, but is supposed to FOLLOW GOD, but as we all know, PEOPLE MAKE MISTAKES! That's why you can't dismiss church because people will hurt your feelings or piss you off or rub you the wrong way. You're going to have these things happen to you. Without a doubt, without a question. But the beauty of a body of believers is that we are each called to love and serve the LORD, and each other. That's all. And if we both have the same set of instructions, beliefs and goals, we'll eventually have to end up in the same place. NO CHURCH IS PERFECT! Why? Because humans are imperfect, sinful, broken. But as a body of believers, we are called to humbly limp together as best we can to love and care and pray for each other as much as we know how and love each other as Jesus loves us. It's odd, but it works.
Sung Yun's Top Ten Reasons to go to Church!
10. Praise and Worship. Where else are you going to sing your heart out and dance around like crazy and not look like a nut? Ok, I look like a nut anyway, but at least it's tolerated or mildly understood!
9. You get to dress up and wear cute outfits and strut your stuff! (okay, not really, I was just checking to see if you were paying attention.)
8. You have a community of people who will pray for you as you struggle through life's inevitable struggles.
7. Communion with God. It says in King James Bible, Matthew 18:20 "For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them." It's a time to reflect on God and everything he is blessing you with.
6. You get to hear wonderful scripture. Let's face, you and I both know we all fail at keeping up with our Bible reading. At the very LEAST, it's a dose of much needed scripture. Why do you need scripture? It's the Word of God, which is the Sword of the Spirit, which is one of our most powerful weapons against the enemy. When he's attacking, you need a counter attack.
5. If you're not in a family, it's harder for you to grow. Growth takes discomfort and change! God's changing you and developing you so you can be of use to him in advancing HIS plan and HIS kingdom. Not yours. (Ok, that was a little plagiarized from my pastor's sermon today.)
4. Accountability! It's a group of people who will keep you in check. Your ego. Your sin struggles/issues. (Everyone has one, trust me.)
3. A place for you to tithe! God gives us 100% of what he have. He asks us to give him 10% back as a love offering. A thank you. And then he will actually bless you with much more! You do the math, it's a win win situation! Try it for one year. Even if you don't believe in God, send a check to any church (mine is Beacon City Church if you don't know where to find one), 10% of all your earnings, and just see if he doesn't bless you above and beyond by the end of the year! You'd be silly not to benefit from his financial blessings!
2. School of life. Life on earth is a just a training ground for HEAVEN (if you let Jesus into your heart, receive Him as your Savior who died for your sins so you can become a new creature in Christ who follows his commands and shares His love with others) or HELL, (if you refuse to accept Jesus into your heart and say that it's just a bunch of baloney and continue sinning and refuse to turn away from your sin and help and love others).
1. Where else are you gonna meet other Jesus freaks?
Ask not what your church can do for you, but what you can do for your church. Too many people come in with the attitude, what are these people doing for me? That might be a wrong attitude! Think about it. Jesus was serving his constituents, and the disciples were healing and sharing Jesus' plan of salvation. They weren't like, oh, what are these people doing for me? It's actually a pretty simple formula. You love others, and God loves you. You meet others' needs, God meets yours. Cool, huh?
If you're not attending church, I question whether you are truly committed to following Christ and loving your fellow human. Or if there is something on your heart you need to approach people about, and forgive them for. My take on Christian conflict is that at least ONE or BOTH members are in sin. We are commanded, if we have a problem, to approach that person directly. Not backstab, backbite, gossip, but to directly go to that person and talk about what's bothering you. Jesus calls for assertive people. Not passive aggressive, but straight up and directly. Paul was all about owning your feelings and taking responsibility for them, as well as your actions. I love that about being a believer in Christ. There is one truth, and that is truth is LOVE. Love of God, love of Jesus, love of Holy Spirit, love of one another. There is always a truth and clarity in love.
Friday, April 29, 2011
Blue like Jazz by Donald Miller
Page 34, such an amazing story on why we should follow Christ.
I realize, as I am living with a girl temporarily, that I am afraid of people. I'm afraid of doing the wrong thing. Upsetting the balance. Being thought of as rude and inconsiderate. Being a bad Christian. I'm not good with boundaries. I want to use all of her stuff without asking. Something you're NOT supposed to do. I'm drinking her juice and eating her food. Reasons why I hate roommates. It's harder to share stuff. There are all these new rules one has to follow and obey out of consideration. And I'm generally fearful of being considerate.
I'm also afraid of intimacy. I'm afraid of people. Rejection. Hurt. Hurting others. Having too high expectations and being let down! I want to love people and be close to them, but it seems like if you show people kindness, they want more and more until it almost eats you up! Like I said, I'm not good with boundaries. But I suppose I'll have to keep learning!
I realize, as I am living with a girl temporarily, that I am afraid of people. I'm afraid of doing the wrong thing. Upsetting the balance. Being thought of as rude and inconsiderate. Being a bad Christian. I'm not good with boundaries. I want to use all of her stuff without asking. Something you're NOT supposed to do. I'm drinking her juice and eating her food. Reasons why I hate roommates. It's harder to share stuff. There are all these new rules one has to follow and obey out of consideration. And I'm generally fearful of being considerate.
I'm also afraid of intimacy. I'm afraid of people. Rejection. Hurt. Hurting others. Having too high expectations and being let down! I want to love people and be close to them, but it seems like if you show people kindness, they want more and more until it almost eats you up! Like I said, I'm not good with boundaries. But I suppose I'll have to keep learning!
Friday, April 8, 2011
Transformational Living
It appears that the doors are being blown wide open. It says in the Word of God that what God opens, no man can shut. Praise the Lord. I have a friend, who appears to be being used as God's instrument to transform my life. And vice versa. Through his mentorship, I am meeting people I never EVER would have met on my own. And through my creative vision, his business will be transformed into a new entity, thriving, bursting, exploding, with new life and vitality. Sound good? It should. This can be your life.
I am officially launching my new business. Starts are never perfect. Look at the birth of a baby. Ew. Messy. Same with this one. This baby has been germinating in my brain for TOO LONG. Gestation period, several months, possibly years. But I am ready to birth her. Push her out of the womb, no regrets, no looking back.
I have several ideas, but the one that really grips me is the idea of me being a LIFE TRANSFORMATION COACH. LTC. A dream builder. I am someone who can help you bring what your dreams are into fruition. Uncover the mud and muck to discover why God put you on this beautiful planet. Yes, there will be many bumps along the way. But in 5 years, my goal is to have a thriving business as a life consultant. A life coach. A dream builder. A professional cheerleader. Basically someone you want to have by your side, every step of the way, cheering you to bring YOUR VISION, YOUR LIFE, YOUR DREAM into reality. Corny. Yes. Powerful, yes. Beautiful, YES! POSSIBLE....YEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!
Don't have an official name yet for my business. But I have a few ideas. Fun in the Son. Ahhh. No. Maybe for my party/event planning company. Transformational Living. I love that one. It may be taken though. What about Christian Transformation Network? I like that, but it sounds too clinical. Maybe later on down the road. It's so "official" sounding. I don't want to sound official at this point.
Goals of my company:
Help people reach their goals, discover, and fulfill their dreams.
Get them to yes!
Clarify their lives.
Help people overcome personal roadblocks and hurdles.
As Dr. Susan Jeffers says, Feel the Fear, and Do It Anyway!!!!
(btw, loved her book. She might be one of the reasons I am doing this today.)
This business will encompass every aspect of human life and development, physically, spiritually, intellectually, emotionally, nutritionally, environmentally.
Personal training if you want to lose weight.
Life coaching for a kick in the pants.
Prayer if you need guidance.
Laying on of hands if you need healing.
Grief Counseling for the loss of a loved one.
I am ready to move on with my own life. I am ready to start my own business. I am ready to launch the next phase of my life.
Second company I am starting is a non-profit ministry. Fun In The Son Ministries. Either that or SAFE, South Asian Friends Eternal. But that sounds kinda gay. This is a ministry to enable and empower missionaries who are already in the field to do their work more effectively. I'll also be distributing bibles and tracts in over 30 languages, God willing. We'll be working with sex-workers and orphans. We'll also be a small loans distributor, for missionaries to transform their lives with BAM! Business As Missions.
Praise the Lord! I am excited for life that is to come, especially the NEXT 15 years.
I'm also considering forming a real estate company for land and building acquistion in rural and urban areas. Rural for a Christian retreat center, where people can go to meditate on the LORD. Urban, to attempt to deal with issues of poverty and homelessness.
Finally, my 4th company, which has been germinating the longest, is launching an international environmental company that helps bring clean water and electricity and the gospel to every poor area in the world. No small task, but I do not serve a small GOD. He told me in Philippians 4:13, I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me. AND I BELIEVE HIM!
God tests us, and asks us to test Him. First, to see if we are worthy. Second, to basically show the world what He's made of. And what we were made for. We were made to glorify Him, and His Son, Jesus Christ, and God KNOWS, I want to glorify THEM. I want my life to be a living example and proof of how incredibly POWERFUL, GLORIOUS, UNSTOPPABLE, AND INDESTRUCTABLE HE IS!!! Yes, I am feeling pretty darn like all of these things myself! And that's cuz he lives in me, and I in him.
Praise the Lord. Email me if you have any questions. I am sure you have many.
sungyun320@gmail.com. I am open to suggestions for names. : )
I am officially launching my new business. Starts are never perfect. Look at the birth of a baby. Ew. Messy. Same with this one. This baby has been germinating in my brain for TOO LONG. Gestation period, several months, possibly years. But I am ready to birth her. Push her out of the womb, no regrets, no looking back.
I have several ideas, but the one that really grips me is the idea of me being a LIFE TRANSFORMATION COACH. LTC. A dream builder. I am someone who can help you bring what your dreams are into fruition. Uncover the mud and muck to discover why God put you on this beautiful planet. Yes, there will be many bumps along the way. But in 5 years, my goal is to have a thriving business as a life consultant. A life coach. A dream builder. A professional cheerleader. Basically someone you want to have by your side, every step of the way, cheering you to bring YOUR VISION, YOUR LIFE, YOUR DREAM into reality. Corny. Yes. Powerful, yes. Beautiful, YES! POSSIBLE....YEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!
Don't have an official name yet for my business. But I have a few ideas. Fun in the Son. Ahhh. No. Maybe for my party/event planning company. Transformational Living. I love that one. It may be taken though. What about Christian Transformation Network? I like that, but it sounds too clinical. Maybe later on down the road. It's so "official" sounding. I don't want to sound official at this point.
Goals of my company:
Help people reach their goals, discover, and fulfill their dreams.
Get them to yes!
Clarify their lives.
Help people overcome personal roadblocks and hurdles.
As Dr. Susan Jeffers says, Feel the Fear, and Do It Anyway!!!!
(btw, loved her book. She might be one of the reasons I am doing this today.)
This business will encompass every aspect of human life and development, physically, spiritually, intellectually, emotionally, nutritionally, environmentally.
Personal training if you want to lose weight.
Life coaching for a kick in the pants.
Prayer if you need guidance.
Laying on of hands if you need healing.
Grief Counseling for the loss of a loved one.
I am ready to move on with my own life. I am ready to start my own business. I am ready to launch the next phase of my life.
Second company I am starting is a non-profit ministry. Fun In The Son Ministries. Either that or SAFE, South Asian Friends Eternal. But that sounds kinda gay. This is a ministry to enable and empower missionaries who are already in the field to do their work more effectively. I'll also be distributing bibles and tracts in over 30 languages, God willing. We'll be working with sex-workers and orphans. We'll also be a small loans distributor, for missionaries to transform their lives with BAM! Business As Missions.
Praise the Lord! I am excited for life that is to come, especially the NEXT 15 years.
I'm also considering forming a real estate company for land and building acquistion in rural and urban areas. Rural for a Christian retreat center, where people can go to meditate on the LORD. Urban, to attempt to deal with issues of poverty and homelessness.
Finally, my 4th company, which has been germinating the longest, is launching an international environmental company that helps bring clean water and electricity and the gospel to every poor area in the world. No small task, but I do not serve a small GOD. He told me in Philippians 4:13, I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me. AND I BELIEVE HIM!
God tests us, and asks us to test Him. First, to see if we are worthy. Second, to basically show the world what He's made of. And what we were made for. We were made to glorify Him, and His Son, Jesus Christ, and God KNOWS, I want to glorify THEM. I want my life to be a living example and proof of how incredibly POWERFUL, GLORIOUS, UNSTOPPABLE, AND INDESTRUCTABLE HE IS!!! Yes, I am feeling pretty darn like all of these things myself! And that's cuz he lives in me, and I in him.
Praise the Lord. Email me if you have any questions. I am sure you have many.
sungyun320@gmail.com. I am open to suggestions for names. : )
Monday, January 31, 2011
I LOVE RUNNING!
It's official. I love running. It took me an hour and a half to drag my butt out into the cold. I was distracted by this awesome show on the Korean channel on being 2nd generation. Very inspiring. I'm considering doing some kind of discussion like that in Boston. Anyway, my run was fantastic and incredibly energizing. I felt stronger on my run than ever! Praise God.
Thursday, January 27, 2011
running is awesome
Sorry all I am writing about is running. I forced myself to go yesterday and today. Yesterday it was a snowstorm, fourth one this winter? Totally quiet on the streets. It was nice to have the reservoir and Brookline all to myself. Ran 5.38 yesterday and 3.63 today. 9 miles in two days and a workout tomorrow. Ugh. As much I hate it, I love it, too. I have lately been obsessed with Fat Shows, shows about people hating being fat and losing weight. Don't know why it has such a fascination for me. I think because I want to be a personal trainer and it helps me get into the mind of these people.
I am ready to quit my job and get a new apartment. Let me know if you know of anyone looking for roommates or a live-in personal trainer! Sung Yun
I am ready to quit my job and get a new apartment. Let me know if you know of anyone looking for roommates or a live-in personal trainer! Sung Yun
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Two days in a row
After such a hard workout yesterday, I can't believe I forced myself to go running again today. But with Ga Yun going to work and a couple of hours to spare, and a day as gorgeous as the night is long, I couldn't say no. I can't say no to the calendar that is staring me in the face. According to the marathon training guide, I have to log at least 25-30 miles a WEEK! And according to my January calendar, I've only run 10 outta 20 days so far. Doesn't look good. When I ran in '05, I started training in February, so I definitely have a jumpstart. Hallelujah.
My mantra is Philippians 4:13. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. My back is KILLING me. I want to rip myself open and break it off. I can't believe I am actually persevering. I probably should consult a doctor, but I figure it's gonna hurt anyway so I might as well be in good shape hurting. My knees don't hurt too badly. Sometimes it gets to a point where my whole body just goes numb and I just keep going, one foot in front of the other. Step by Step, ooh baby.
My mantra is Philippians 4:13. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. My back is KILLING me. I want to rip myself open and break it off. I can't believe I am actually persevering. I probably should consult a doctor, but I figure it's gonna hurt anyway so I might as well be in good shape hurting. My knees don't hurt too badly. Sometimes it gets to a point where my whole body just goes numb and I just keep going, one foot in front of the other. Step by Step, ooh baby.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Marathon Training: 4 weeks in
Much can be said about having a goal and sticking to it. Goal: Run the Boston Marathon in less than 4 hours. Or at least beat P. Diddy's NY Marathon time of 4:20. With the run date of April 18th looming almost exactly 3 months away....yeah, I think I can do it.
I came home at 9:30 pm and I DID NOT want to go out there. Snowy slushy misery. But I thought about the goal, and how I can't sleep at night if I don't exercise now that my dad is helping out more and I am not working out as much. Hallelujah! I thought about how much it sucks to do a marathon with insufficient training. I thought about bashing my 4:53 time in 2005. I logged onto my friend Nabil's training website Fivi.com and got excited as I started mapping out my run. And then I forced myself out into the cold.
It was absolutely poetic. The streets, empty. The snow, ethereal. With crystals truly from heaven falling, there was silence of the streets only occasionally interrupted by a car swishing by. I pulled out a decent 9 minute mile pace. My thoughts were alternated by a "Let's do this bitch" and "hm, peaceful. Glad I chose to run." Both sentiments were very satisfying. I was slip sliding all along the slushy slush around the Brookline reservoir. Neil is absolutely right about the whole getting into a routine thing. I doubted it, but I find it's true. Go into mindless patterns. Don't think, just do. Just go. I decided to change it up a bit and head up Washington St instead, to make it a 5 mile run instead of my usual 4. My body was kind of regretting it, but my mind was feeling satisfied by pushing said body into submission. I ran by The Fireplace, out of which some nice jazz was spilling out. Decided to put in when I saw my friend Fred at the bar. He offered me a beer. Very tempting to stop running and drink, but I was DETERMINED to run the full 5 miles. I logged onto a marathon training calendar and today said I had to do 5 miles so by golly 5 miles I decided to do! I told myself that my reward would be the rest of Chapter 8 of The Help. I can NOT put that book down! Oh, it is delicious. I miss my reading. It's good to be back.
Another victory for today...the location of my parents' surprise party has been finally tamped down and nailed. Feb 11th, Temple Obahai Shalom (Lovers of Peace), here we come!!!!
I came home at 9:30 pm and I DID NOT want to go out there. Snowy slushy misery. But I thought about the goal, and how I can't sleep at night if I don't exercise now that my dad is helping out more and I am not working out as much. Hallelujah! I thought about how much it sucks to do a marathon with insufficient training. I thought about bashing my 4:53 time in 2005. I logged onto my friend Nabil's training website Fivi.com and got excited as I started mapping out my run. And then I forced myself out into the cold.
It was absolutely poetic. The streets, empty. The snow, ethereal. With crystals truly from heaven falling, there was silence of the streets only occasionally interrupted by a car swishing by. I pulled out a decent 9 minute mile pace. My thoughts were alternated by a "Let's do this bitch" and "hm, peaceful. Glad I chose to run." Both sentiments were very satisfying. I was slip sliding all along the slushy slush around the Brookline reservoir. Neil is absolutely right about the whole getting into a routine thing. I doubted it, but I find it's true. Go into mindless patterns. Don't think, just do. Just go. I decided to change it up a bit and head up Washington St instead, to make it a 5 mile run instead of my usual 4. My body was kind of regretting it, but my mind was feeling satisfied by pushing said body into submission. I ran by The Fireplace, out of which some nice jazz was spilling out. Decided to put in when I saw my friend Fred at the bar. He offered me a beer. Very tempting to stop running and drink, but I was DETERMINED to run the full 5 miles. I logged onto a marathon training calendar and today said I had to do 5 miles so by golly 5 miles I decided to do! I told myself that my reward would be the rest of Chapter 8 of The Help. I can NOT put that book down! Oh, it is delicious. I miss my reading. It's good to be back.
Another victory for today...the location of my parents' surprise party has been finally tamped down and nailed. Feb 11th, Temple Obahai Shalom (Lovers of Peace), here we come!!!!
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Making Peace with High School
I watched Lucas last night. I really wanted to go snowboarding on the hill, but once I saw Corey Haim's cute, nerdy little face gawking at cute untouchable girls, I was totally hooked. It's probably something only people who grew up in the 80s can understand, the stupid and predictable story lines, the football player jocks and cheerleaders, versus the nerdy, weird outcasts, and of course, being tormented for being different. I didn't think much about it after it was over. I mean, it had a pretty good ending with Lucas being knocked around on the football field, after he joins the team to try to impress a girl. This was no Facing The Giants! It was actually pretty realistic!
Anyway, I woke up this morning after having a dream with random high school people in it, one of them used to be my best friend. And I felt this odd sense of peace come over me. I've been praying a LOT over the past five years to get healing about relationships and memories from high school, and oddly enough, I feel like God answered my prayers! It only took me 18 years!!! Ha ha ha. I think it's cool to be different, to always march to your own beat, to break the mold, to be yourself, and I can say, I was always myself in high school. Most of the time. C'mon. It's high school.
I'm proud of myself, for standing up to the bullies, for having the courage to fail, but also the ambition and drive to succeed. It's all good: the regrets, embarrassments, friendships, relationships, the highs, the lows, the good, bad and the ugly. The people who were mean, the people I WAS MEAN to, I pray that they can forgive me as I can forgive those who have hurt me. God is so good. He truly is the ultimate healer. And I can say, I never thought this day would come. It's always like that after a dark snowstorm when the power goes out, there is a beautiful sunny day when the sun is shining and all is bright. Life is good. For those of you who are in my life now, I feel so blessed to be in the sunshine and warmth of your love.
Anyway, I woke up this morning after having a dream with random high school people in it, one of them used to be my best friend. And I felt this odd sense of peace come over me. I've been praying a LOT over the past five years to get healing about relationships and memories from high school, and oddly enough, I feel like God answered my prayers! It only took me 18 years!!! Ha ha ha. I think it's cool to be different, to always march to your own beat, to break the mold, to be yourself, and I can say, I was always myself in high school. Most of the time. C'mon. It's high school.
I'm proud of myself, for standing up to the bullies, for having the courage to fail, but also the ambition and drive to succeed. It's all good: the regrets, embarrassments, friendships, relationships, the highs, the lows, the good, bad and the ugly. The people who were mean, the people I WAS MEAN to, I pray that they can forgive me as I can forgive those who have hurt me. God is so good. He truly is the ultimate healer. And I can say, I never thought this day would come. It's always like that after a dark snowstorm when the power goes out, there is a beautiful sunny day when the sun is shining and all is bright. Life is good. For those of you who are in my life now, I feel so blessed to be in the sunshine and warmth of your love.
Saturday, January 8, 2011
2011: It's a New Year!
So far I am off to a good start. Resolutions resolved, I have been running twice and swimming once. I woke up this morning and my back was killing me (dang couch!). If Jesus wanted us to suffer as he suffered, well, then I am truly living the Christian life! Ha ha ha. But I did run a whopping 10!!!! miles today! Without stopping! Mind you, I have not run 10 miles in probably over 2 years. But with about 10 runs in the past month, my muscle memory is kicking in. And on my last run I didn't even have to stop to catch my breath. Praise God! Also, with my new smartphone (thanks, dad!), I have become ONE OF THEM. Yes, folks, I have become a runner who listens to music. I couldn't help it. I am sorry to go the dark side. But it was necessary. I had such a hard time motivating. MOTI, MOTI! So, I dragged my sorry butt out into the snowy cold, (no thank you, gym rats!) and a little Pandora action got me into gear. AND HOW! Nothing a little Pink and Black Eyed Peas can't cure!
2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore if any man (or woman!) be in Christ, he/she is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.
That is most certainly good news on all of our parts, and it especially portends well in the New Year!
2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore if any man (or woman!) be in Christ, he/she is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.
That is most certainly good news on all of our parts, and it especially portends well in the New Year!
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